tonight i got owned
i spent a lot of money on dinner and a date with my ex
then i find out after bad sex she is still seeing someone
meanwhile i was paranoid any given other felon in her apartment were going to shoot or stab me
worst thing the guy she is still seeing goes to the same mental health clinic as me
:(
and he is some psycho native american guy
so now i have to change mental health clinics
>:/
and i am now prolly all full of stds despite wearing a condom
i didn't enjoy the sex at all because i knew something was fishy
i am giving up on love
doesn't help that my dad treats me like trash every day
doesn't help that my little brother tells pretty much everyone he meets how stupid i am
it's not my fault my iq is dropping 8pts on average a year
in another 10 or 15 years i will be a vegetable at this rate
:(
at-least my neurologist was able to reproduce the behavior in my brain in which i go partially blind by figuring out what induces it
apparently when i go damn near 100% i end up having an outer body experience due to being 100% cut off from my stimuli
and that is why i keep having premonitions and experiencing 'temporal displacements'
apparently just watching a tv show like "csi miami" is enough to set it off
:(
hell eventually it will get worse to the point of just seeing the no walk signal at an intersection could set it off, while i am driving
the other month the power went out due to a **massive** lightning storm and while approaching a 4 way blinking red signal i nearly ran over a cop that just looked like a spatial distortion to me
:(
the neurologist thinks it might be retinal migraines
i think it is also combined with some form of epilepsy though
:(
meaning i may very well not even be schizo
hell i might not even be bipolar
the epilepsy would explain why my iq went from 173 at age 5 to 118 at age 27
i've only done drugs a total of 30 different days in my life at most
doing drugs 30 different independent days out of 27 years would not cause a 55pt drop
hell you could smoke crack all day long 30 back to back days and not have a permanent 55pt drop
i am pretty sure the only thing wrong with me is retinal migraine induced epilepsy along with the brain damage caused by such
i spent a lot of money on dinner and a date with my ex
then i find out after bad sex she is still seeing someone
meanwhile i was paranoid any given other felon in her apartment were going to shoot or stab me
worst thing the guy she is still seeing goes to the same mental health clinic as me
:(
and he is some psycho native american guy
so now i have to change mental health clinics
>:/
and i am now prolly all full of stds despite wearing a condom
i didn't enjoy the sex at all because i knew something was fishy
i am giving up on love
doesn't help that my dad treats me like trash every day
doesn't help that my little brother tells pretty much everyone he meets how stupid i am
it's not my fault my iq is dropping 8pts on average a year
in another 10 or 15 years i will be a vegetable at this rate
:(
at-least my neurologist was able to reproduce the behavior in my brain in which i go partially blind by figuring out what induces it
apparently when i go damn near 100% i end up having an outer body experience due to being 100% cut off from my stimuli
and that is why i keep having premonitions and experiencing 'temporal displacements'
apparently just watching a tv show like "csi miami" is enough to set it off
:(
hell eventually it will get worse to the point of just seeing the no walk signal at an intersection could set it off, while i am driving
the other month the power went out due to a **massive** lightning storm and while approaching a 4 way blinking red signal i nearly ran over a cop that just looked like a spatial distortion to me
:(
the neurologist thinks it might be retinal migraines
i think it is also combined with some form of epilepsy though
:(
meaning i may very well not even be schizo
hell i might not even be bipolar
the epilepsy would explain why my iq went from 173 at age 5 to 118 at age 27
i've only done drugs a total of 30 different days in my life at most
doing drugs 30 different independent days out of 27 years would not cause a 55pt drop
hell you could smoke crack all day long 30 back to back days and not have a permanent 55pt drop
i am pretty sure the only thing wrong with me is retinal migraine induced epilepsy along with the brain damage caused by such